ramblings: America's "Funniest" Videos & Neti-pot

1)  Last night it got to be 10:00 and I hadn't eaten dinner, hadn't even been home for hours.  So I stopped in at Sticky Fingers to see what they have that's fast & cheap. (like I don't already know)  So while I was eating, the chair I sat in directly faced the large TV at the end of the bar.  So as a rare treat, I watched some TV.  And remembered why I don't get cable TV at home.
     The show that was on was America's Funniest Video's.  So I'm watching... clip one is some kid (like 4 years old) doing something that wasn't that smart-- I forget what it was-- and he ends up getting hurt and bawling loudly.  They cut to the show's host, and he's laughing, makes a joke, and the audience laughs even harder.  WAIT, WHAT???  I mean, yes, if an adult had done that, it would be mildly amusing to some people since an adult really oughta know better.  THE KID'S FOUR YEARS OLD, CUT HIM SOME FREAKIN' SLACK!
     So then I'm watching the next clip... SAME THING.  Child does something dumb, child gets hurt, child cries, audience laughs.  One of an adult doing something dumb & getting hurt.  Next clip, back to the kids.  Repeat ad infinitum.  HOW SICK IS THAT?  It's not like the kids have a chance of knowing any better!  I mean, COME ON!  I got angry enough to go ask the bartender to change the channel.  If I knew what items were advertised on that show, I'd boycott 'em, just so the those companies start to feel some pain.  Not so funny any more, IS IT?  Shouldn't have had your advertisement run during a show where kids get hurt and everyone thusly laughs!  (did I just make up 'thusly'?  what did I mean?  forethou?  whilely?  why is my spellcheck throwing a conniption fit?  why do 'conniption fit' & 'duck fit' mean the same thing?  do ducks commonly have conniptions?  am I divagating?)

2)  So ANYWAY, I started to catch a cold last week.  I hate that.  Last time I had a full-blown cold, I made out my will and made sure my next of kin were on standby.  I hate it so much... get ready... I ACTUALLY bought a Neti pot!  Growing up, I've always hated the Neti pot with a vile distaste.  I mean, here's a device that looks all sweet and innocent, all ready to help you get your sinuses cleared... by POURING WATER UP YOUR NOSE INTO YOUR -=BRAIN=- WHERE IT SLOSHES AROUND BEFORE SOME OF IT-- NOT ALL-- OOZES BACK OUT THROUGH YOUR OTHER NOSTRIL.  "You're acting kinda strange today, like you've got water on your brain.  Oh no-- Neti pot again?  Didn't you learn your lesson last time?  You barely survived..."  I've often heard that Shi'ite warriors, when captured & faced with the choice of the Neti pot or torture before death, they choose torture and death every time, and quickly too.  (if there's any Shi'ite warriors reading this blog, I mean no disrespect to you or to whatever notion of a deity you currently hold OR to the solemn state of [wherever] you hail from-- go in peace)
     But it shows how much I'm a changed man-- I just BOUGHT a Neti pot.  I use it TWICE a day now.  Well, while I'm still congested-- it's not like it's that fun.  It's pretty sweet.  I'd recommend it.  I'd recommend it to my friends, not my enemies.  Well, I'd recommend it to my enemies also, if they were congested.  Then I'd run back to my friends & have a laugh.  "Can you believe I just did that?  They're gonna be in so much pain!  Now please hand me my Neti pot."  :-)  (I've spent 5 minutes trying to work through if that makes sense-- ah shucks, blog it)