calling theoretical astrophysicists on their bluff

So I'm watching a really great series of TV shows on Netflix, How The Universe Works, produced by the Discovery Channel in 2010.  Holy cow is this stuff I didn't learn in high school-- probably since when I was in high school, we didn't know this stuff.  (or think we know it, it is just scientific hypotheses, but even gravity was only a hypothesis, (even recently questioned by one nutcracker) and to my knowledge it's never actually been proven  ;-)  So come to find out that the earth is rotating around the sun-- yes, got that, move on-- and the sun is only one star in the Milky Way galaxy-- yawn, next slide please-- but that the Milky Way is orbiting around a super-massive black hole-- WHOA!  Wait, what?  Did I hear you correctly?  <Googles like mad>  Huh!  Guess I did! 

Now, I gotta pick a bone with these so-called "smart" astrophysicists.  Here's what they sounded like in elementary school: "Um, my homework?  Uh, yeah, um, I did that.  I woulda gotten an A on it too, but unfortunately the dog ate it.  Sorry teach.  You can just go ahead and give me that A anyway though."  That was elementary school, this is now: "Hi boss.  Why'd you call me in your office?  Oh, um, you want to know why galaxies are moving toward and away from each other?  That's simple.  Gravity!  Oh you want more than a one-word answer, hmm... yeah... ooh I got it!  Yeah, there's this stuff, see, and you can't see it, touch it, or taste it.  In fact it's undetectable by any instrument known to man today.  Yeah, that's it, that's the ticket!  What is this stuff called?  Oh... that's easy... it would be called... um... dark matter, yeah!"
     All joking aside, actual quotes from the theoretical astrophysicists: "Dark energy is... really weird."  Yeah, that's 'cause you just made dark matter up, that's how you explain the fact that you can't explain it.  The show claims that dark matter is "Ghost-like material that will pass right through you, as if you didn't exist at all."  Oh, yeah, sure, no I believe you, no problem there.  But dark matter or not, you still gotta take out the trash and clean the bathtub.  (which, if you hate doing, a Scrubbing Bubbles is awesome)
     Yeah, we might make some giant scientific breakthroughs regarding this dark matter, but at the moment this is pretty much what we call "a lazy way of explaining things you don't understand."

http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1SNNT_enUS416US416&aq=f&ix=hca&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=dark+matter

I.Q. test: should you or should you not bungee-jump over crocodile-infested waters?

"Hmmm... I don't know... tough question... so down there are alligators... that will kill me if given the chance... actually eat me... and you want to push me off this incredibly safe alligator-observation ledge so that I hurl toward them rapidly, only to be pulled back at the last second by this very thin stretchy rope... yeah, huh, sounds like a solid good plan.  You've really thought this out!  Yeah, let's do this to this!"

<JUMP>  http://news.google.com/news/more?pz=1&ned=us&ncl=dl8Qd8SJh1EV8kMv-wO4stgLqVUSM&topic=h


Later, "WOAH that was way too close!  I had to swim with my ankles tied together and everything.  Talk about a rush!  I'm never EVER bungee-jumping over alligator-infested waters AGAIN...  Oh what's that you say?  You know of a place that will let me bungee-jump over a bear pit?  Cool!  How soon can we go?  I'll have to work it in though, as my next adventure will be to have my body suspended over a bed of nails by a strand of used dental floss... that will be a jab of fun!  It should be so exciting, it'll hurt!"

very useful info from a recent Dept. of Transportation study!

This videoed P.S.A. is so ridiculously useful to drivers!

Heh heh heh...

OMG-- Google has built the bridge between yesterday and tomorrow'!

If you think I'm kidding, watch the Dalai Lama & Archbishop Desmond Tutu 'hang out' on Google+!!!  Think I'm joking?  Here:  http://thenextweb.com/google/2011/10/10/watch-the-video-taken-when-dalai-lama-archbishop-desmond-tutu-hung-out-on-google/  Mind-blowing!

well that was an interesting solution, thought I'd share: WHOOPS, THE INSTRUCTIONS ARE IN A LANGUAGE I DON'T SPEAK

I'm sharing this nifty bit of problem-solving in case you might someday make use of it.  So yesterday, I bought two Thermos mugs for hot drinks, except they weren't the Thermos brand, it was some brand no one's ever heard of.  (unless you actually have heard of GoGo, in which case I mean no one but you)  So I opened a bottle to see if they're machine-washable.  Shoulda looked for that in the store, didn't think of it.  "Hey, whoa, the directions are in French!  Ah, I'll deal with this tomorrow."  Well now it is tomorrow.  I just did a nifty piece of problem-solving that you mightcould someday use.  Here's the steps:

1. I know that scanning an image in using my printer/scanner will result in an image file, like a .gif, .png, .jpg, .bmp, .tiff, .eps, what have you.  I want a way to actually get the text into a text document, a .txt file.  I could import the image into an OpenOffice document (or Word, if that's the way you roll, but trust me, OO is way better, and free), but then it's still an image-- I can't edit the text in an image.  I want to be able to open it in something like Windows Notepad.  So I do a little hunting-- ooh, nice, got it.  I found SimpleOCR, where OCR is Optical Character Reader.  (by the way, if it ever happens that you come across a word on the internet that you don't know-- never happens, right?-- like say, "OCR", there is an oh-so-slick extension for the Google Chrome web browser by Google Dictionary that lets you simply double-click a word you don't know on any web page, and a popup appears with one of that word's definitions; if that doesn't answer your question right away, you can click More to see everything Google Dictionary knows about this word, which is nearing the limits of the collective worldwide human knowledge.  How am I doing on making this the Guiness world's longest parenthetical expression?  I've already surpassed the Great Parenthetical Wall of China from 1987...)
2. I used SimpleOCR to scan in my French instructions and spend a few minutes correcting it's guess of what letters it thinks it saw.  Okay, now the French text I see on the screen matches the French text I read on the paper.  (yeah, I could've just typed it in, all in French, to start with, but this is cooler, easier, and anyway, je ne peux pas taper en français, heh heh)
3. Now that I had the French text typed into the computer, I copy-and-pasted it into Google Translate.  AHA!  So I'm seeing this:

"  utilization, ENTRETIEN ET

 

GARANTIE DE LA BOUTEILLE EN

AGER INOXYDABLE

Avant d'utiliser la |boutellle pour la premiere fois

Returer toutes les etiquettes et tons les matenaux d'emballage,

puis laver la boutelle en acier inoxydable Range Kleen a l'eau

tiede savonneuse et la rincer a fond afin       d'eliminer toute poussiere

provenant de la fabrication, de l'emballage et de I'expedition

Bouteille isolante incassable en acier

Votre nouvelle bouteille incassable en acier de marque

Range Kleen est concue pour durer des annees

Utilisation et entretien

ATTENTION: Lorsqu'elle contient un liquide chaud, tenir

la bouteille hors de Ia portee des enfants

ATTENTION: Ne pas trop remplir. Risque de brulures.

* Pour une capacite d'isolation maximale, rechauffer

ou refroidir la bouteille avant utilisation. A cette fin,

Ia remplir d'eau chaude ou de d'eau froide,   y mettre le

   

couvercle, la laisser reposer pendant cinq a dix

minutes, puis la vider."

... and it means this:

"utilization, MAINTENANCE AND

 
WARRANTY OF BOTTLE
STAINLESS AGER
Before using the | boutellle for the first time
Reture all the labels and colors matenaux packaging
Boutelle then wash the stainless steel Range Kleen Water
warm soapy and rinse thoroughly to remove any dust
from the manufacture, packaging and I'expedition
Unbreakable steel thermos
Your new bottle unbreakable steel brand
Range Kleen is designed to last for years
Use and Care
CAUTION: When it contains a hot liquid, keep
Ia the bottle out of reach of children
CAUTION: Do not overfill. Risk of burns.
* For a maximum capacity of insulation, heat up
or cool the bottle before use. To this end,
Ia filled with hot water or cold water, put the
   
lid, let stand for five to ten

minutes, then drain."

Okay, question answered!  So I need to hand-wash my Boutelle.  Okay, somewhat lengthy process, but that's just 'cause it was the first time, next time will be smoother!  And I got to my answer!  In the business, that's known as a "success"...

PLEASE READ: your screensaver can help fight illnesses!

"What?  How can it do that???"  So there's quite a few distributed computing projects (and a run-down on how to join one), one of the famous ones being SETI @ Home, in which your home computer analyzes radio broadcasts from the skies, looking for patterns.  I ran that for awhile, until I finally said "You know what?  Helping look for extraterrestrial life is cool, but there's gotta be a distributed computing project that helps people."  The point of a distributed computing project is that it takes a massively complex problem, one that would take humans an incredible number of years to solve, and by breaking the massive hard problem down into smaller less hard problems, then each smaller problem can be worked on by different computers.  And even better, if the software is made such that it runs as a screensaver, it uses your computer only when you're not!

     So I found BOINC, which is the software you need to install in order to run any number of projects in your computer's spare time.  I ran SETI @ Home for a while before that realization kicked in that there are other, more direct routes to helping humanity.  So I poked around... FOUND IT!  I found the World Community Grid, hosted by IBM, which specifically hosts projects that aim to make human life better.  This page lists some of their achievements to date, as well as a brief discussion of the software's security, which tells us that BOINC was developed at the University of California Berkeley.  And this discussion of the project's recent 7th birthday lists details about their achievements to date as well as discussions of the most active projects.

Here is the email they sent me when I signed up-- sorry, the formatting got "all weird", but you can read most of it:

Dear JeffKnox,

We would like to congratulate you for successfully completing your first result for World Community Grid. This contribution and all future computer time that you donate will help advance research into: Help Fight Childhood Cancer FightAIDS@Home Human Proteome Folding - Phase 2 Help Conquer Cancer In addition to participating by donating your computer time, you may extend your involvement by joining a team (if not already a member of one) or inviting other people to join World Community Grid. Learn about other ways to get involved on the Explore World Community Grid page. You can track the research currently being done by your computer on the Results Status page. This page reflects the: time when a research work unit was sent to your computer current status of the work unit(s) you are processing work units that you have completed (for 4 days after validation) amount of CPU time donated to complete each work unit You can also automatically share your accomplishments with your friends by integrating World Community Grid with your Facebook and Twitter accounts. This helps spread the word and get more people involved! Get started by setting up your Social Networks.  World Community Grid is proud to be a founding member of People for a Smarter Planet. It's a network of communities, sponsored by IBM that helps people make meaningful and personal contributions toward a clear goal -- building a smarter planet. Visit People for a Smarter Planet on Facebook, and click the "Like" button. Then connect with other World Community Grid members to show your support.  If you'd like to download the World Community Grid software to another computer, you can do that here. Thank you for contributing your unused computer cycles to help humanity! We look forward to your participation for many years to come! The World Community Grid Team And in case you misplace this email, you can got to my blog and scroll down to find a dark blue World Community Grid square that has the links you need to get started.  Please, family and others, sign up, and if you do so, encourage others by going to this post on my blog and underneath will be a spot to leave comments!  Let's make a better world together!

ATTENTION DOG OWNERS: Riley goes bike riding

Just wanted to share this clip that mom took.  We just got home from the beach, and at the beach we went to, Deer Island, there are bike trails galore.  So we rented 2 tricycles and a bike.  Before we went, dad found this great leash attachment for a bike at The Dog Outdoors, and this one is sweet since (pay attention, dog owners) the end of the pole that attaches to the bike on one end has on the other end a stretchy leash attachment, so the dog isn't choked to death when the bike speeds up or slows down.  Not too much, but just enough to let them know "okay, it's time to start slowing down now."  You can see the Ri-meister stretch it out a bit...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPA9Cvlk5WM

Boy did she love that!

happy Festivus everyone!

Happy Festivus everyone!

nifty! Use Google Maps to see the ocean floor!

Huh!  I just found this by accident, and it's slick!  Go to Google Maps, and change the map mode in the upper-right from Satellite to Earth by putting your mouse where it says Satellite and then clicking on Earth.  Zoom out to see the world's oceans!  It's a neat way to see that Hawaii is really just mountaintops!

2011's most viral video

We have watched this about 42 million times: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqj9xrhGpoc

4 definitions of necessity

1. http://images.google.com/imgres?q=define+necessity&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=653&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=E9Jgaft43rlXeM:&imgrefurl=http://orphansmom.com/index.php%3Fp%3D1_10_Photos&docid=e0O8bNOEG5gOMM&imgurl=http://orphansmom.com/web_images/define_necessity.jpg&w=550&h=372&ei=SSHxTrS_F821tweyg9zPBg&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=174&vpy=312&dur=229&hovh=185&hovw=273&tx=129&ty=74&sig=115761461638537358386&page=1&tbnh=140&tbnw=181&start=0&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:6,s:0
2. http://images.google.com/imgres?q=define+necessity&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=653&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=-JP8d9rUxu8Z3M:&imgrefurl=http://burningbabylon.wordpress.com/2011/02/15/can-you-define-necessity/&docid=g_hL4MvqxtHEIM&imgurl=http://burningbabylon.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/christmas-define-necessity.jpg&w=720&h=396&ei=SSHxTrS_F821tweyg9zPBg&zoom=1
3. http://images.google.com/imgres?q=define+necessity&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=653&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=t4EqXOWef1cGFM:&imgrefurl=http://www.buzzfeed.com/burgnyc/define-necessity-2ti8&docid=nORDE8G8S0lUAM&imgurl=http://s3-ak.buzzfed.com/static/imagebuzz/terminal01/2011/12/14/12/define-necessity-25167-1323883032-2.jpg&w=604&h=302&ei=SSHxTrS_F821tweyg9zPBg&zoom=1
4. http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1SNNT_enUS416US416&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=define%3A+necessity#hl=en&rlz=1C1SNNT_enUS416US416&q=necessity&tbs=dfn:1&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=4yXxTqKWJoWFtgeW-IXQBg&ved=0CDUQkQ4&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_cp.,cf.osb&fp=a07b3761d35d504a&biw=1366&bih=653

THIS IS -=SO=- COOL! I've figured out where I was for those 5 weeks!

   THIS IS SO COOL!  I've figured out for sure where I was for those 5 weeks!  (5/26/07 - 7/1/07)  So we're currently on vacation at Hilton Head, SC.  Several of my relatives have been here, and if so, I guarantee you've been to this spot.  So we rented a bike & two tricycles for the week (this island has bike trails all over-- excellent), and we just biked to the South Beach Marina. (home of the Salty Dog restaurant-- if you've been to the island, that should jog your memory)
   When we first arrived at South Beach, I was like "I've been here... recently, within the last few years."  My folks were like "No, no you haven't, and certainly not since the wreck..."  Then as I wandered around, I just knew where certain mundane things were-- "I spent a lot of time on this dock by this launching ramp in the marina, looking at that cove over there, I walked right between this pool and these tennis courts a good bit, and here's the spiral wired staircase I predicted would be right here-- in fact, I believe I lived here, at the top of this spiral staircase, in that condo, above this parrot."  (I've never lived anywhere close to here)  It was kind of like having a dream-- well, exactly that actually-- and then getting to walk through your dream but in reality!  HOLY JUNKBUTTER!!!  I cannot believe I found it!  I haven't been looking for these spots that stand out so vividly in my memory banks, but I definitely know this is where I was!  I just have so many recollections of mundane things at this Marina... that never happened.  It could have just been a dream, but there are so many different memories at this spot, it would have to have been a sequence of recurring dreams.  Which is exactly why I say I was here during the coma-- I don't dream anymore, a well-known side-effect of brain injuries.  Musta been those 5 weeks then...
   So y'all call it a "coma," I now call it a "vacation!"  I mean, how cool is that?!?  That drunk driver sent me on a 5-week retreat to Hilton Head Island!  Thanks!  It makes sense, too, the whole bit about your brain returning to where it's at it's most relaxed...  I certainly didn't feel like I was missing anything, but I definitely feel whole, complete again...

I'm a sucker for cuteness...

Awwww, cute...  check out a baby playing with a puppy...  http://gma.yahoo.com/video/parenting-26594265/baby-plays-with-puppy-cutest-youtube-video-ever-27619223.html

And check out this pic dad snapped the morning that we were packing up to go to the beach for a week...

Riley is so nervous this morning, she curled up in my suitcase......"just in case you're thinking of leaving without me"

you know what just occurred to me about the word "deodorant"?

The word "deodorant", meaning the stuff us Americans put in our armpits, has precisely the wrong prefix.  It's not taking odor away, which is implied by "de-" anything, it's replacing your natural body odor with some sweet summer leaves or somesuch.  So technically, it should be called reodorant!  (okay, mini-rant is over, I'm OK again, just had to get that off my chest; little weird inconsistencies like that bother me)

the author of Life Without Limits

So for my recent birthday, my California relatives gave me the book Life Without Limits.  (thanks y'all!)  It's an unbelievable premise: this man, Nick Vujicic, was born with NO ARMS OR LEGS!  And he maintains a healthy sense of humor, and apparently achieves more than anyone guessed-- he's a motivational speaker.  (I haven't read it yet, but mom has and says it's awesome)  Dad just found a video of the author, and you just gotta see this video on Youtube! If you'd like to pick up a copy of the book yourself, here's where you can find it online, or at some of your local bookstores or even in a library. (click "Get this book in print" on the left)  (HA!  I just found that if you say to find this book in a library, it starts with local libraries... all the way down to libraries in Australia and Singapore!  Can you imagine trying to get a library card?)

closing in on other Earths!

WAY COOL!  Ever since I saw Hubble 3D, the movie (highly recommended), I've been convinced since the universe is that big, there's just no way that humans are the only life in the galaxy, we just gotta find 'em.  Well, cool, in the news recently was a finding of "other Earths," potentially habitable.  Awesome!  Getting closer, getting closer...  Check out the news coverage of the newly discovered planets!

"are you on crack?... like FDR was?"

Ha!  So very often in my therapies, my therapist would ask me to do something, something that for me at the time was very hard.  I would so often come back with a "Are you on crack?"  My folks thought it was mildly amusing... until dad recently slipped a disc in his back, and is currently undergoing physical rehab.  The other day, he asked his P.T. "Are you on crack?"  Now you know how I felt, huh dad?  And here's the surprising bit he saw on TV the other night-- FDR WAS ON CRACK!  HUH!!!

WHOA COOL! (yes I'm a techno-geek)

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/this-could-be-big-abc-news/see-tablets-2012-144516380.html

now that was satisfying all around

I took my trike the furthest yet today, and got rewarded with a tasty lunch at a cafe I couldn't easily get to before.  And when I was eating lunch, I saw a sign hanging that really alarmed me... (this sign, comments below)

what a fantastic tradition

Now this is a cool tradition.  I'm going to start trying to get our hockey team to follow suit...

http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/blog/puck_daddy/post/Video-Watch-25-003-stuffed-animals-fly-in-a-hoc?urn=nhl-wp18984