laughter is contagious

Scared or amused?  I can't seem to make up my mind!

eep-day oughts-thay

Why isn't it known as ig-pay atin-lay?  That would make too much sense?

Google Car, take 2

Man alive, this is gonna be cool!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGvHahR_ZKQ

feast your eyes...

... on some videos mom found.

• The fountains of Bellagio.  This really is quite beautiful, I've watched it several nights in a row.  If you've never seen it, be a virtual tourist.
• I'm loving the fact that this guy doesn't commit the cardinal sin of taking himself too seriously.  (of course, he also knows all the pickpockets in town, so sure, keep your eyes on this fool cop making a spectacle of himself, don't worry AT ALL about that guy standing uncomfortably close behind you or the Italian child that keeps "accidentally" bumping into your pockets and then running to give something to some swarthy bearded Tunisian...)  (no offense to the Tunisians, I just picked someone at random)
• You aren't blown away by the abilities children display?  NOW are you?  Watch all the way through, it's highly amusing how into it he gets.  Hey, bud, I hear Def Leppard is looking for a new drummer.  (not really, 'cause that guy's drive to achieve mirrors, nay trumps, mine.  I don't mean to put myself down, I just can't claim I've sold 20 million of anything worldwide.  He's like "aww, so you have double vision, poor you, waaah waaah waaah, you're leaving me High 'n' Dry")

ramblings: America's "Funniest" Videos & Neti-pot

1)  Last night it got to be 10:00 and I hadn't eaten dinner, hadn't even been home for hours.  So I stopped in at Sticky Fingers to see what they have that's fast & cheap. (like I don't already know)  So while I was eating, the chair I sat in directly faced the large TV at the end of the bar.  So as a rare treat, I watched some TV.  And remembered why I don't get cable TV at home.
     The show that was on was America's Funniest Video's.  So I'm watching... clip one is some kid (like 4 years old) doing something that wasn't that smart-- I forget what it was-- and he ends up getting hurt and bawling loudly.  They cut to the show's host, and he's laughing, makes a joke, and the audience laughs even harder.  WAIT, WHAT???  I mean, yes, if an adult had done that, it would be mildly amusing to some people since an adult really oughta know better.  THE KID'S FOUR YEARS OLD, CUT HIM SOME FREAKIN' SLACK!
     So then I'm watching the next clip... SAME THING.  Child does something dumb, child gets hurt, child cries, audience laughs.  One of an adult doing something dumb & getting hurt.  Next clip, back to the kids.  Repeat ad infinitum.  HOW SICK IS THAT?  It's not like the kids have a chance of knowing any better!  I mean, COME ON!  I got angry enough to go ask the bartender to change the channel.  If I knew what items were advertised on that show, I'd boycott 'em, just so the those companies start to feel some pain.  Not so funny any more, IS IT?  Shouldn't have had your advertisement run during a show where kids get hurt and everyone thusly laughs!  (did I just make up 'thusly'?  what did I mean?  forethou?  whilely?  why is my spellcheck throwing a conniption fit?  why do 'conniption fit' & 'duck fit' mean the same thing?  do ducks commonly have conniptions?  am I divagating?)

2)  So ANYWAY, I started to catch a cold last week.  I hate that.  Last time I had a full-blown cold, I made out my will and made sure my next of kin were on standby.  I hate it so much... get ready... I ACTUALLY bought a Neti pot!  Growing up, I've always hated the Neti pot with a vile distaste.  I mean, here's a device that looks all sweet and innocent, all ready to help you get your sinuses cleared... by POURING WATER UP YOUR NOSE INTO YOUR -=BRAIN=- WHERE IT SLOSHES AROUND BEFORE SOME OF IT-- NOT ALL-- OOZES BACK OUT THROUGH YOUR OTHER NOSTRIL.  "You're acting kinda strange today, like you've got water on your brain.  Oh no-- Neti pot again?  Didn't you learn your lesson last time?  You barely survived..."  I've often heard that Shi'ite warriors, when captured & faced with the choice of the Neti pot or torture before death, they choose torture and death every time, and quickly too.  (if there's any Shi'ite warriors reading this blog, I mean no disrespect to you or to whatever notion of a deity you currently hold OR to the solemn state of [wherever] you hail from-- go in peace)
     But it shows how much I'm a changed man-- I just BOUGHT a Neti pot.  I use it TWICE a day now.  Well, while I'm still congested-- it's not like it's that fun.  It's pretty sweet.  I'd recommend it.  I'd recommend it to my friends, not my enemies.  Well, I'd recommend it to my enemies also, if they were congested.  Then I'd run back to my friends & have a laugh.  "Can you believe I just did that?  They're gonna be in so much pain!  Now please hand me my Neti pot."  :-)  (I've spent 5 minutes trying to work through if that makes sense-- ah shucks, blog it)

people I don't even know are proud of me!

ALLOW ME TO BRAG:

     As I was leaving the Acceleration Sports Institute today, all of the trainers were talking to this one gentleman I've never seen before.  As I passed, he said "Good job Jeff, I'm proud of you, keep it up." 
     Me: "Ah, thanks... um... have a good... day." (I almost said "I'm proud of you too," but thought better of saying that to a total stranger-- it's a good thought, but I can't back it up)  So I motioned with my head for Ginnie, who'd been my trainer today, to join me on the side.  Whispering: "Ginnie, who's that?" 
     "That's Al Miller, coach."
"What sport?"
     "NFL guy extrordinaire.  Denver Bronco's, New York Giants, Atlanta Falcons..."

"And all he knows about me is that Greenville News article on the wall?  Wow..."

     "Well, no.  We talk about you to special people.  He's special people."

"Oh cool!  Thanks!"

     So I go look him up.  Huh, she's right.  Well that was kinda cool.  People I don't even know are proud of me.  And it's people who know all about perseverance & overcoming obstacles!  I think I just completed a New Year's resolution from my childhood.

http://www.nflhspd.com/ask-coach-miller/

     Now to get to working on my other childhood resolutions: a functional skyscraper made entirely of balloons (BB guns not allowed within 5 city blocks), a free pill that painlessly converts your earwax entirely into healthy edible chocolate while you sleep, and special glasses that seem normal but let you visualize it in color when other people pass gas.  (imagine wearing them during a presidential speech)  (yes, if you can't tell, I'm entering the four-year-old stage again-- hey, it was fun the first time...)

My story's making the rounds without my knowledge! Sweet!

So the other day, I wasn't feeling well, so I went to get some hot soup somewhere.  I ended up back at Lemongrass, the Thai restaurant.  At the end of the meal, I asked the waitress "So I've seen you a bunch before, right?"  
   --"Yes."  
"I expect I probably told you my story about 8 or 9 times."
   --"No, only once."
"That's surprising-- it seems like most folks heard it at least five times before I got it into my head that they'd heard it."
   --"But I've been retelling it, since it's such a strong don't drink AND drive story."
HOW AWESOME IS THAT!?!?  Other people are telling my story for me!  That makes it exponentially more powerful to hopefully save lives!